almost there

So I haven't written since the lovely day that I entered taper. I began taper, the period before the race that you decrease your mileage and workouts, right after I finished my twenty miler. It has been a nice break to say the least.

Let's see.... I ran 14 the Saturday after Thanksgiving with Wendy and some ladies she runs with regularly. It was so wonderful! It was really really cold, but we ran the greenway trail and it was beautiful. We even saw a little family of deer crossing the trail. Wendy and I had wonderful conversation, per usual. I have just met some really amazing and wonderfully inspiring people through this whole thing. I feel so lucky.

Last weekend was 10, which I ran with Wendy again, except she had to keep going for another 10 after I was done... no fun! It felt unbelievable, literally. I couldn't believe it was my last Saturday run with the Team. It was definitely bittersweet- I am so excited for my race and so proud of myself, but I also feel like I'm losing something that has been such a huge part of my life for the last six months. I guess I never imagined the time would actually go by so quickly. I remember hearing about other teammates who were training from earlier races, they would be running 12 or 16 when I was doing 8 and I just never really thought I would ever get there, you know? And now here I am, two nights before my race and I just can't get over how surreal it all feels.

I know some people are probably reading this and wondering why I feel so attached to a running group. It's because it is so much more than a running group. I have raised over $3,000 for an amazing cause, I have met really interesting and wonderful people. I have put my mind and my body to the test, and I have learned that I am so much stronger than I ever thought. Team in Training has given me a purpose for the past six months when I've been trying to sort out my life, it has allowed me to somehow fight the disease that affects my family and so many others.... what an amazing gift this has been. I just can't get over how great an impact it has made on my life in such a short period of time.

Up next comes the race.... THE BIG DAY IS FINALLY HERE! My family and I leave for Kiawah tomorrow morning, so we can relax and take a look around and my Dad and I will get all signed in. Then, tomorrow night, there is an inspiration/pasta dinner. I've heard it's a really emotional experience, they have survivors and participants talk to the Team and just make us realize the real reason everyone decided to do this, to help fight leukemia and lymphoma. It should be a really great motivator for the next morning. Saturday morning will start early with a team meeting, and then the start at 8am. I'm really excited and really really nervous all at the same time.

My whole family is coming to watch, so is my boyfriend Doug, and three very special friends from school. I'll also have the thoughts and prayers of so many wonderful friends and supporters, it will be great. I really appreciate all of you who have been reading this blog throughout my training. I hope I have been able to provide some insight, and some proof that anyone can do this. It has been such a cool way to look back and track all my mileage, I'm really happy I did it.

This isn't the end, I'll be writing more when the race is over. I really am so thankful to all of you, thanks for taking the time to care :) Think of me on Saturday morning at 8 (and 9, 10, 11, and 12) while I'm running.... I'll need all the help I can get!

Anybody can do just about anything with himself that he really wants to and makes his mind to do. We are capable of greater than we realize. - Norman Vincent Peale, author

Running is a big question mark that's there each and every day. It asks you, 'Are you going to be a wimp or are you going to be strong today?
- Peter Maher, Irish-Canadian Olympian and Sub-2:12 marathoner

twentytwentytwenty

Well this was it.... the hardest run to date. I ran 20 miles this past Saturday, and it just sounds scary, doesn't it? I was really nervous, but I'm so happy I did it.

We met at 7 am as usual, and it was pretty chilly. Decided I need to get myself some gloves sometime this week. Anyway, Lucy and Wendy were both there, and so was Brian, who is also running Kiawah. We all started out together, but at about mile 7 or 8 Lucy and I fell back a little bit. We run at a slower pace, and we've gotten pretty tuned into each other's running style. We don't talk a lot while running (besides ocassionally cursing the general state of our bodies), but we just know when the other person is hurting or needs to stop to stretch. We were both fighting some major pains on Saturday, so we took plenty of stretch breaks along the way. It's funny, because I've had to change my mentality about stopping and stretching as I've been training. I used to think that stopping was giving up, I planned to stop for water breaks and that's it. Well, I'm not trying to qualify for Boston, and I've decided that I'll stop whenever and wherever I need to. Ha.

Lucy and I did alright, but it was not a fun run from about mile 16 on. All the usual aches and pains were present and accounted for, plus some new ones. It was funny because Jay, one of our coaches, was on his bike so he could cycle around and find everyone (there were 4 of us doing 20, some doing 18, 16, 12, etc.) . For the whole run Lucy and I were smiling and telling him that we were hurting, but we were doing great, yada yada yada. Well flashforward to the last 2.5 miles, Jay saw us and pulled over to where we were to check in. I think I said something along the lines of, "This is miserable and we are not having fun". Haha, poor Jay. He told us to take it easy on our way back in, we were so close and it would be over before we knew it.

The coaches were right once again, they really know their stuff. We came in and were trying to stretch out some of the pain. Really, it was the worst. My hips literally felt like they were expanding, my feet hurt, my knees... all of it. Jay convinced me to try an ice bath when I got home, and I was actually looking forward to it, which should give you a good idea about how desperate I was. I came home and pulled on a sweatshirt, sat in the tub, and then called Katie so she could take my mind off the frigid water. The coaches said that cold water would be enough, I wouldn't need ice, but I would have to sit in the tub while it filled up or I would never actually get in. I screamed a little bit, my toes turned a light shade of purple, but it was totally worth it. I honestly don't think I would have been able to walk on Sunday if I hadn't soaked for awhile.

I just really appreciate my coaches and my teammates. I know that I wouldn't be able to do this without their encouragement, their advice, and their friendship. This experience has been such a blessing. We had a little party on Sunday afternoon, in celebration of Lindsay, our honored patient. She had a check-up this week and her blood counts are the best they have ever been, she is thankfully extremely healthy. It just makes me realize that there are so many things that are bigger than myself. If this little girl can go through chemo, if millions of people can fight this terrible disease, well than I can run 26.2 miles.

"Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained." - Marie Curie

less than a month away

Hi everyone! Yeah, you read it right.... I'm less than a month away from race day! Ah, can you even believe it? I was thinking about it today, and it feels like I've been training forever! I'm really excited about it, and I can't believe that I'm almost there.

We had a recovery week after the 18, and I ran 12 on Saturday. 12 used to be big and intimidating to me, so it was almost laughable that I was calling it my recovery run. Anyway, we all ran uptown (which is actually downtown Charlotte for all of you who don't live here, don't ask because I have no idea), and it was an absolutely beautiful day. My run wasn't terrible, but it wasn't great from about 8 miles on. My knee was killing me and I just felt exhausted, which became very frustrating seeing as how this was supposed to be an easier run.

I think I've decided that it helps me to be slightly terrified before my long run. Kind of like when you're working under a deadline, and you're not sure you're going to make it, you perform better. Before my 18 miler, I felt like I was about to take a midterm I was completely unprepared for... very nervous, but it went alright. I guess I knew it was going to be awful, I was ready for it to be awful, and in the end it wasn't as awful as I had expected. Ha. So I'm thinking the moral of the story is to never overestimate myself (or my joints), and not to get too comfortable.

I don't think I'll have a problem being scared this weekend, I've got 20 miles on Saturday! Yikes!! This will be the highest mileage I will run before race day, so that is really exciting/unbelievable all at the same time. I ran yesterday, and I was sore and iced after, so I'm not sure if I'll run tomorrow, Thursday, even though it's supposed to be my last work out day before the long run. Lately I've had to really back off on the running during the week, my body is just too sore. I don't mean my muscles are tight, because they are, but it's more that my knees and hips get really tight, and my arch on my left foot just feels pulled all the time (probably is). But other than those three areas I'm great :)

I'm excited to see how it goes on Saturday.... wish me luck!

A woman is like a tea bag- you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.
-Eleanor Roosevelt


With my Dad in this one, and with Wendy to the right. This is after our run on Saturday, everyone was hanging out at Owen's Bagels, and Lindsay and her family were there too. Lindsay is our little honored patient hero (little because she's about 4 years old), and it is such a great encouragement to see her! Wendy has quickly become one of my very favorite people to run with, she's the best. Thanks to Colleen for these pics!

The big one-eight... can you believe it?

I have to say that I warned you... I failed to blog on time yet again. But I like to think that it's part of my charm. Maybe? Hahaha. I had a really lovely weekend up in Boone, visiting Appalachian and all my friends. It was really nice to get out of Charlotte for a bit, and to see so many wonderful people. They totally inspired me to run my 18 miler this past Sunday. But before I get to that, let me back up and tell you about what I've been doing.

On Halloween weekend I ran 16, which was the farthest yet. I was by myself, it was kind of raining, and it went really well. I just plugged into my ipod and did it! It took me 2 hours and 44 minutes, but it honestly didn't feel that long. Maybe that is God's little gift- when I finish a long run, I'm always kind of surprised that I actually ran for two straight hours, or whatever it was, I'm able to just zone out. I actually check my watch more when I'm at the gym or on a short run than I do on Saturday mornings. Anyway, it went really well, but I did have to stop and stretch about every 15-20 minutes during the last few miles. My knees have been getting really tight, and now so have my left foot and my hips. The streching really helps, it makes me feel really energized, until I have to stop again and stretch some more :)

All in all, I can't complain. And, I was able to go visit a good friend in Columbia, SC when it was all over. We went out for Halloween, and I was done after about two drinks, so maybe that's a good thing too... going out is much easier on my wallet!

Yesterday, Sunday, I ran the dreaded 18. Lucy from the Team waited to run it with me, and we headed out at about 7:40 that morning. It was freezing when we started, but it warmed up and turned into a really nice day. We made good time, coming in just under 3 hours. We did a lot of stretching stops in the last six miles, but it made me feel better that we both needed to stop, like my body wasn't the only one angry about all this running. It was funny, because I think I had little bursts of a runners high throughout- I would feel amazing and all the aches and pains would be under control, then I would have to stop and stretch, and then I'd feel great again. The funniest part is when you start running again after a stretch break- definitely the most pain ever. I decided it feels like I've just had two hip replacements and I'm wearing 15 lb. leg weights on both ankles... but then it goes away and all is well.

It's so much easier to run with someone else, even though Lucy and I both had our ipods in the whole time, it's just nicer. And afterwards we hobbled onto a bench to drink our recovery drinks and chat. It has been really great to have Lucy in this with me- we're the youngest, the unmarried, and some of the only participants without kids, so we've naturally gravitated towards one another. I was really happy she waited to run with me :)

In other exciting news, I'm just over $100 away from becoming a TNT Rockstar! Haha, that means that I have successfully raised $1,000 over the minimum. I'm hoping that I can bring in some donations before November 30th to reach that goal. How exciting!

Thanks for putting up with my irregular posting... hopefully what I write is amusing enough to make up for it.

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. - Abraham Lincoln

A half marathon and some change...

Well, I'm officially the worst blogger ever. It has been almost three weeks, and I know that's terrible. To my 5 followers..... I'm very sorry. Okay, now I'll update you!!

So the last you heard from me I was getting ready to run my 12 miler in D.C with Doug. Well, I did it, in 2 hrs. 2 mins. And, Doug was on his bike the whole time riding along beside me. I give him a lot of credit, because I was going pretty slow (although he did point that out several times). It was really cool because I was running all around the Mall, seeing all the monuments, the museums, and around the Capitol building. It was also the National Day of Prayer, so we were also able to see all the protesters and life-sized replicas of the 10 Commandments. Wow.

Then, the next week, I was thankfully back down to 8 miles. I never thought I would be happy to run 8 miles, but it was such a nice break. I ran with Wendy, which is always nice because I swear she can talk for a full 26 miles, making the run so much easier. I can't remember the time, but we were running through uptown Charlotte, so I was looking at all the old beautiful houses, it was a nice change of scenery.

And then this past Saturday, the big guns. I ran 14 miles in 2 hrs. 22 mins. I was beyond nervous for this run. I was all by myself and I just couldn't imagine running a whole 14, but it actually went a lot better than I had envisioned. I took a gel shot after the first 40 mins., and then I used Bloks for the rest of the run, about every 15 mins. I also used Gatorade for the first time since I've started training, and I think it worked really well for me. I was tired, but I never felt completely exhausted, and I didn't stop and walk, I just stopped at the water stops to refuel. So all in all, it went really well and I was really excited about it. I did spend the rest of Saturday alternating the ice pack from my knee, to my foot, and then the other knee. I'm still a little sore (pathetic, I know) but I'm happy I did it!

Friday of this week I'll be running 16, back in D.C again. I am definintely nervous, even though it's only two more miles than last week. It's just daunting to think about "oh I'm just going to go run for 3 hours, then ice my body for 2, and then I'll be done, no big deal". But I really can't complain because everything is just going so well. I have raised over $3,000.00!! So I have surpassed my goal, and I am so thankful that I don't have to worry about coming up with the money in time, I just have to concentrate on the running.

I'm getting so excited for the day of the race. I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it's both a relief and a little sad. I think I'll miss the team once I'm done. Everyone has been so incredibly supportive, cheerful, and friendly. It has been so much fun! Okay, I promise I'll try to get better about posting, but really, you probably shouldn't expect too much :)

We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the only string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes. - Charles R. Swindoll

10 miles under my belt,,,

Hello all-

The big one-oh this past Saturday went well, I'm really happy about it. My first double digits! Thank you all for such wonderful support, I appreciate it so much. So, I guess I'll give you the run-down:

Wendy and I ran together for the first 4, but since she's training for Disney (a whole month later than Kiawah), she was running 8, so she turned around at 4 and headed back. I was kind of dreading running the last six on my own, but I actually kind of enjoyed it. I used my ipod for the first time during my long runs, kind of just tuned in and ran. It was nice. I ran the 10 in 1 hour 51 minutes, so not too bad. I was proud of myself- no walking! Thanks to the water belt, I didn't even have to stop for water :) I love running on Saturday mornings with the Team because there are so many people out, all running or walking different mileage (depending on what race they're training for), so the entire time I'm running I'm passing teammates and coaches, and everyone is always cheering everyone else on. It really makes it so much easier when you have people encouraging you along the way.

My knee was still bothering me, and we can't quite figure out what's up. I think I'm really going to need to focus on my stretching and icing before and after running. Looks like I'm going to be investing in a few bags of frozen peas :) I was a little sore on Sunday, but not bad at all. Mainly, I'm just completely wiped out after running. It's funny, because immediately after the run I'm on such a runner's high, I feel amazing. But a few hours later, I can barely keep my eyes open and my body just wants sleep. Needless to say, I don't get a whole lot accomplished on Saturday afternoons.

I am really loving the Bloks. They are easy to take, don't sit in my stomach while I'm running, and they actually taste really good. I had a half-open pack in my room, left over from the previous Saturday, and I randomly thought about eating them for a snack, that's how good they are. No kidding. I'm going to buy the margarita flavored ones.... I think I mentioned them, extra sodium to compensate for all the sweating, but unfortunately no tequila, ha. I'm also going back to the running store to ask them about my knee. I want to have my shoes looked at, just to make sure either the size or the model isn't causing foot and knee pain.

Tonight we ran as a group at the Y. It wasn't too long (probably since it was so humid, first day of Fall my foot), but we did do hills for the first time. I was expecting worse I think, but they found a residential street that has a pretty good hill, then dead ends up top a little ways. We had to do three loops, up and down. I just like running with the group becuase everyone is so positive, and we always manage to have a good time while sweating all our bodily fluids out at the same time. F-U-N.

I'm heading up to D.C to visit my boyfriend this weekend, and we have some friends meeting us too so I'm really excited. Not to worry, I'm going to be running my 12 miles on Friday morning. I'm looking at this 12-miler like a little test: 12 is almost 13.1, a half marathon, so it should be a good indicator of how I'm doing. I think Doug is going to be riding a bike along with me, so I'm sure he's really excited too. It will be a nice change of scenery, but Doug will really have to be a great cheerleader to make up for not having the Team with me :)

The purpose of life is not to be happy - but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all. -Leo Rosten

big freaking news.

Okay, big news.... I have raised $2,755.00!!! I had to raise a minimum of $2,400.00, and I set a personal goal of $3,00.00, and I have been so amazed by all the love and generosity I have received. I am so excited I can't even tell you! Also, I got a surprise in my inbox today: a $250.00 anonymous donation. I'm guessing that whoever donated reads my blog, because they wished me luck in my 10 miler tomorrow morning. I hope you're reading this so I can tell you how much I appreciate your donation. Truly, your support of myself and this cause means so very much, thank you.

And thank you to everyone who has supported me along the way. I can't tell you how amazing it is to open an envelope, or an email, with a donation and a little note of encouragement. I've been saving each note so I can look back when I'm feeling tired or lazy and I don't want to work out. Ha, you'd be surprised how big a motivation it can be. Thank you.

That's all, I've got to get to bed so I can run tomorrow. Lucy isn't going to be there, so I think I'm going to bring the ipod. I've just downloaded some Priscilla Ahn, Ingrid Michaelson, and Lenka. I guess I'm on a female empowerment kick. Anyway, they're great and you should listen :)


Blessed are those who give without remembering. And blessed are those who take without forgetting. -Bernard Meltzer